rebron System Error -45

"In my 14 years of doing this, I've never had anyone faint on me while they're laying down."* – the nice LabCorp technician

System Error -45: rebron system crash, fainting spell when blood is drawn

I mentioned I had a physical exam a couple weeks ago, sailed through it with flying colors. You'd think I would, right. Doc said to go get a blood test which is just part of the whole getting a physical thing. I didn't get a blood test a couple years ago because I knew what was going to happen.

So anyway, went and got my blood test today around 9am. Hadn't eaten yet and ate around 8pm the night before — sushi/sashimi, some chocolate cake.

I get into the office and I'm trying to psyche myself out of fainting. I'm a big boy, this time I'm going to watch so I know what's happening, so my mind doesn't wander. It's not a big deal, I've done this before. I do the pee sample and then back into reception area still trying to psyche myself out of fainting.

I tell the lady I've had a history of fainting when getting blood drawn and that I should lay down, so over to the scaredy cat room. We start talking, tell her my problem, asked her if the needle felt like a mosquito bite, and she said I wouldn't even feel it.

The technician puts that rubber thing around my arm. She tells me to make a fist. She puts the needle attached to a tube in my arm and I don't feel a thing except I can feel my arm stressed a little bit just like when you get your blood pressure taken.

For some reason, I can feel the blood getting drawn from my arm, not really, but mentally I feel like someone started a slow leak that's not going to stop. I'm still trying to talk to the technician. I start to feel light headed. I'm sweating, and then *poof* done, I'm out. I don't even realize it. It's a lot like a Mac OS X system crash or a blue screen of death. One second it's working, another second done.

Lights out, completely. I'm in this dream world. There's people around, I'm in this very happy place, and the technician starts calling my name and waking me up and I groggily get up. I really don't know how long I've been out for, could've been 2 minutes could've been 30 minutes (but I think it was just a minute). I have no idea where I am, and then I finally remember, oh yeah, I'm getting my blood drawn.

Crazy.

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* The real translation for the technician's quote. "In my 14 years of doing this, you're the biggest pu$$y I've ever met…" I need to go do another Ironman. F#ck!!

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